Gal Gadot

Jackass Reviews: Wonder Woman

On this episode of Jackass Reviews The Jackass is talking the new DCEU installment Wonder Woman! Before she was Wonder Woman, she was Diana, princess of the Amazons, trained to be an unconquerable warrior. Raised on a sheltered island paradise, Diana meets an American pilot who tells her about the massive conflict that’s raging in the outside world. Convinced that she can stop the threat, Diana leaves her home for the first time. Fighting alongside men in a war to end all wars, she finally discovers her full powers and true destiny.

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Taken from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Batman_v_Superman:_Dawn_of_Justice

Batman v Superman: Dawn of Screw the Fan boys!

One of the greatest debates of all time, has, and always will be, who would win in a fight, *Insert iconic name here* and Batman. More times than not, the answer are Batman, because he is Batman. But the greatest of these arguments has always been what if the iconic name being inserted was Superman. The last son of Krypton. Faster than a speeding bullet, more powerful than a locomotive. Able to leap a building in a single bound. Is it possible, for The Batman, a man with no powers, to defeat Superman? I have always said yes. There would be a way. And now, we finally, for the first time, see these two iconic heroes on screen together. Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice has arrived, and is here to answer the debate once and for all.

Plagued with hatred from fans from not only the polarizing ending of Man of Steel, but for the casting of Jesse Eisenberg as Lex Luthor, Gal Godat as Wonder Woman, and most notably Ben Affleck as Batman, BvS has had its share of haters. Most unwarranted, seeing as none of these haters had seen the film. Disagreeing with casting is one thing, but declaring the film would be terrible because of it is another. I have disagreed with the casting of Gal Godat since the beginning, but I went into this film tonight in the hopes that she would prove me wrong. And did she? We will find out soon enough.

Batman v. Superman follows the events of Man of Steel. Fearing the actions of a Superman left unchecked, Batman takes on the man of steel, while the world wrestles with what kind of a hero it really needs. With Batman (Ben Affleck) and Superman (Henry Cavill) fighting each other, a new threat, is created by Lex Luthor (Jesse Eisenberg). It’s up to Superman and Batman to set aside their differences along with Wonder Woman (Gal Godat) to stop Luthor from unleashing certain doom across Metropolis, and the world. The film is directed by Zach Snyder and also stars Amy Adams, Diane Lane, Laurence Fishburne, Holly Hunter, and Jeremy Irons as Alfred.

I went in to BvS with high hopes, checking my reservations on Godat and Eisenberg at the door. And right of the bat, pun intended, I was bored as hell. The entire first hour is GAH-BAGE! It drags, and has the choppiest editing I have ever seen. We open up with the Wayne’s dying, again, and damnit, I get it, The Wayne’s died! We go into a world building scene that really did work building on the finale of Man of Steel. And that was cool, it was, but then it’s gets choppy, and has no pacing what so ever.

Zach Snyder over uses his slow motion early on, completely takes me out of the film. While they take the time to try and build the relationship between Lois and Clark, it has no heart to it. I don’t care about their relationship. Maybe it is because I just don’t like Amy Adams as Lois Lane. On the other hand, there a little sprinkle of Godat’s Wonder Woman that was done well, and the relationship between Wayne and Alfred. But no other chemistry hits.

The story itself is all over the place. It makes no sense at times, and jumps into Amazing Spider-Man ish of set ups. Some that were pretty cool, but had you scratching your head like Hot Thor Time Machine from Age of Ultron. There are plot points that seem to happen, just because, and have no real reason, or explanation.

It is not all bad however. Like I said, Batman is freaking awesome. Ben Affleck is freaking incredible and looks badass as The Bat. He is on point as Bruce Wayne, and insane as Batman. When he is not on screen I found myself waiting for him to be back. Jeremy Irons is as good as the new Alfred. Definitely a new take on the character and it works. Batman legit is a different character then we are used to. Because Batman legit murders some fools. Yes they deserve it, but he just killing folks.

I even liked Eisenberg as Luthor. He is a little out there, he is not so Gene Hackman genius mastermind Luthor, little more of “I’m crazy let’s be a bad guy” And it works a little, and perhaps it will grow into a great character. Gal Gadot is functional. They used her great, and her intro was awesome. I still don’t think she can carry her own film.

I also feel the score, was God awful. The only buts of music I enjoyed were the small samples of the Man of Steel theme, and Wonder Woman’s theme. And if you disliked all the destruction in Man of Steel, I am pretty sure Snyder is giving you the finger in this. All in all, the film needs a lot of work. Maybe the extra 30 minutes of R rated footage will improve it. However what this movie did do right is give us the best Batman I have ever seen, even if he doesn’t care about the lives of the bad guys. I’m giving it a score of 2.1 with a .4 bonus for Batman. That gives us a Jeebus Score of 2.5. But what say you Jackass Nation? What are your thoughts? Who is your favorite Batman? Sound off in the comments below, and remember, It Is What It Is!

The Jeebus Score explained

The Jeebus score is out of a possible 6 points. Films are giving a max of 1 point each for Entertainment Value, Story/Writing, Performance, Direction, and Casting. There is also a possible bonus up to .5. Any film between 2.5 and 4 is considered a good film. 4-5 is a great film. Anything over 5 is an incredibly amazing film. To get a perfect score of 6.5 a film will pretty much have to be The Empire Strikes Back or The Godfather.

Triple Niner, uh I’m sorry, did I catch a niner in here?

Dirty cops, the Russian Mob, a detailed heist that involves killing a cop to create a diversion. Through in an all-star cast and you should have the recipe for an incredible and intense film. One that could truly be remembered as one of the greats. Triple 9 has all these ingredients, but are they cooked properly? Well, let’s talk about that.

Triple 9 is directed by John Hillard, the guy that did Lawless, and was written by Matt Cook, I have no idea what else he wrote. It has one the most talented casts I have ever seen assembled, Casey Affleck, Chiwetel Ejiodor, Anthony Mackie, Aaron Paul, Clifton Collins Jr, Norman Reedus, Gal Gadot, Woody Harrelson, and Kate Freaking Winslet. If that is not a list line up, I do not know what is.

The film follows a crew of corrupt cops and criminals who are being sent on heist missions by the Russian Mob, led by Irina Vlaslov (Winslet) whose husband and head of the mob is locked up abroad. Irina uses her sisters (Gadot) ex-husband Michael (Ejiofor) to steal what she needs to free her husband. When a final mission is deemed undoable, the crew decided the only way to pull it off is to cause a distraction by killing a cop (Affleck) which will send all officers on a triple 9 (roll credits) leaving them free to run their final heist. Unfortunately when your crew is full of criminals, no twist is left unturned.

Again that sounds like a great pitch right? Unfortunately it is not a great film. In fact, it is pretty boring. And unnecessarily slow! Don’t get me wrong, when the action gets going, it is pretty fun to watch, but there is so much unneeded wasted screen time in between. Most of these characters are also pretty poorly written. Leaving the audience with no one they really want to root for, seeing is how they are mostly all scumbags. Sure they have their redeemable qualities here and there, and reasons for doing what they do. But in the long run, you just don’t like them.

That’s not to say that the cast did not do incredibly well. If there is one major positive about this film it is that the cast is all on point with one minor exception. Woody Harrelson, who is great in his own right, plays the character a little too, Woody like. If that makes any sense. He is just a bit over the top and it something he has been doing a lot. I don’t know if this is a director’s decision or his own, but come on Woody, just be great, don’t be cartoony.

But again, everyone else is spot on with the roles they are given. Ejiofor keeps you enthralled all film long and Casey Affleck has such a unique ability to disappear into roles. Something his brother has never really been able to do. You always know you are watching Ben Affleck, but with Casey you always see the character. Anthony Mackie is a top tier talent, and incredible in here. I love watching him onscreen. Kate Winslet is Kate; I didn’t even realize it was her until I sat down to write this. That’s how good she is.

Speaking of this cast, let’s talk about one thing, real quick, I’m getting a little side tracked. But this film literally has Falcon, Baron Mordo, Scud, Tallahassee, Batman’s little brother, and Wonder Woman all in the same film. That is a little crazy. But speaking of Wonder Woman, walking into this I was really hoping that this would be the performance that sold me on Gadot as Wonder Woman. Unfortunately, it was not. Not that she was bad; she was good at being hot and delivering 3 lines. But nothing of substance.

All in all Triple 9 was kind of a letdown. It is obviously not the worst movie I have ever seen, it had its ups. But unfortunately not as high up as I had anticipated it. Maybe wait to catch this one on FX, or USA or something like that. Not something you need to shell out the cash for.

An action cop drama with little action, and a boring story. Great cast, fun performances, but ultimately a letdown. Especially as a follow up to the directors previous film, Lawless. Action scenes are fun, and well done, but everything else from dialog, to story, to character development falls flat. I’m giving it a Jeebus score of 2.4.

The Jeebus Score explained

The Jeebus score is out of a possible 6 points. Films are giving a max of 1 point each for Entertainment Value, Story/Writing, Performance, Direction, and Casting. There is also a possible bonus up to .5. Any film between 2.5 and 4 is considered a good film. 4-5 is a great film. Anything over 5 is an incredibly amazing film. To get a perfect score of 5.5 a film will pretty much have to be The Empire Strikes Back or The Godfather.